So, I am just going to get straight to the point here; I'm broken. These past few weeks have been some of the hardest weeks I've encountered in my life thus far, and I hate admitting it. I tried to suppress the feelings and negative thoughts, but they just kept coming back around. HOWEVER- this post is actually going to be meant to be uplifting. During this spiritual battle, I was afraid, alone, depressed, and my anxiety was through the roof. Of course, my parents were worried about me and I was worried about myself, because I had no idea what was going on in my walk with The Lord, or even with just my heart.
Something that happened that helped partake in my complete 180 I eventually lead back up to was my family. Let me just tell you- I would not be the women of God that I am today without my parents. They are a constant reminder of love and compassion even in the darkest of times for me. My mom would call me and pray for me over the phone nearly every night and my dad did a good job of keeping me distracted with things that would keep my head out of dark places. They have been my complete support system since day one and I couldn't be anymore grateful for them than I already am.
Something I decided to do during this time was fast. My church back home was fasting at the time and I really felt like God called me to do this. So, as God calls, I listen. Every time I craved what I got rid of- I dug as far into the word and into prayer as my brain could handle. Some nights I would sit there and just cry as I read, because I knew in my heart that the whole time God was condemning my heart of the things Satan tried to put in there during those past few weeks. I ended up doing a devotion last week for SLC and I honestly didn't think there was anything better to speak about besides Trials. I was going through one of my own and digging into the word for that not only helped me speak to my friends, but speak my soul as well. During this time I ran into a few verses that stuck out to me. Mark 4:40 was one in particular. It says, "He said to his disciples, "why are you so afraid? Do you have no faith?" They were terrified and asked each other. "Who is this? Even the winds and waves obey him." It made me realize, even in my own storm, why am I so afraid? If I look behind me, I see that God controlled those storms, so why would he not be able to do the same thing now? Another verse was Matthew 7:7. It says, "Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you." So, that's when I realized I needed to get on my knees and cry out to God. He will help me when I ask, so once again, why am I so afraid to ask? I remember being so angry that God was allowing this to happen to me, and it wasn't fair. When I began to pray and be at peace in prayer, I realized the real battle that was going on.
One last tool I used in this spiritual battle was a book that was recommended to me by a family member. It's The Bondage Breaker by: Neil T. Anderson. It's about overcoming negative thoughts, irrational feelings and habitual sins. YALL- Satan is a real person and he is out to steal, kill, and destroy every last piece of you. However, God is here to break the bondage. I'm still reading the book, but what I've gathered so far is when you are as far down in a valley as you can be, you need to cry out to God and rebuke Satan in Jesus name! He wanted to see me as low as I was, he wanted me to not be okay, and feel alone and unworthy and unloved. He fed off of me doubting God and pushing him away. Something that really frustrated me was the fact I felt so weak, because I was allowing Satan to push me to the edge, but something this book has taught me is that he preys on the ones who have everything together, and have a strong relationship with the Lord, because they are his biggest threats. It didn't make me look "weak" to God, but it made me look strong.
I am finally no longer afraid or feel alone or vulnerable. I feel strong in the Lord and I trust that His love is bigger than my valleys or darkness, because he is here to save the lost and heal the broken and fix the weary. He is a God of miracles and a God of mercy and grace, because he loves us more than we could ever imagine. Satan today is livid, because instead of coming out of this hurting and broken, I came out strong and more in love with Christ than ever. GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME AND HE IS LOVE!!!
Monday, September 18, 2017
Wednesday, September 6, 2017
The Struggle with Social Media
How many minutes of the day do we spend on social media? The average human spends around 116 minutes, or two hours a day on social media. That is ridiculous. I can't say that I'm not guilty of that myself though. Social media is just a small part of what I want to talk about. I actually want to talk about the media in general and how they influence Christian Millennials, like myself, in everyday life. I know that almost all of my friends have twitter accounts and that's what I want to talk about first. We go on twitter all the time and I know some of the first tweets I see are about what is going on around the world right now. Can I ask you something though? Is most of that positive? No, usually it is something about our president, the police force, or the racism issues going on that day. I may shock you by saying this, but did you know that not everything being said on twitter isn't everything going on in the world? I hate that as Christians we go on social media and see all of these negative things, but we miss out on the best parts of the world. Almost once a month at work I see veterans come in, or cops come in, and some kind soul offers to take care of their bill. Even today my roommate and I got to help an old lady carry her groceries to the car and then she offered us her shopping cart to use and gave me a hug. (you have to pay 25 cents for a cart where we go) Things are not always bad around you.
Yes, I know what you're thinking. Bad things are still happening. How about instead of going on social media to see those things, you go out and do a kind act to substitute for all the evil going on in the world. As children of God, we are called to love on everyone in everything that we do, even if we don't agree with someone else's opinion. I know as a millennial, that we are constantly being looked down on when it comes to social media, being on our phones, and being closed minded. So, why don't we prove the rest of the world wrong? I know I struggle with going on my phone and looking at social media and being angry and upset at someone for their opinions. However, why not instead we agree to disagree? I told one of my friends today that I am so sad for our generation, because they don't get to see how big our world and our God is, because it's constantly being portrayed by social media and the media in general in such a negative light. God called us to be vessels and lights to the non believers and to glorify him in our actions outside the church, because it honors him. So next time you see something that you don't agree with, just move on, go out and change the world, because that's what God expects of us. We can't go out and fix racism, or hatred, or anything else all in one day, but we can go out and be those vessels God has called us to be so we can start to be that change in the world.
In conclusion, I know sometimes looking at these posts can make you upset or angry, but next time you see one just think of what God has done for us. He saved each and everyone of us by dying for our sins, and there is nothing that could be going on in the world that could be bigger than that of Our God!! Go into the world with "blind faith" and know without seeing that not everything going on is as evil as our social media and media is putting out there. One of my favorite verses is Proverbs 3:5-6 and it says this "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean NOT on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." In the end, none of this chaos compares to God's glory and love for us as long as you submit to him, he will fix it all in the end. So, I challenge you next time you see something negative on twitter; tweet something positive. Next time you see an angry post on Facebook; remind everyone that God's love is greater than our anger or doubt. Media and social media are not the answers to your understandings about creation and the world- God is!
With love,
Hollie Adams
Yes, I know what you're thinking. Bad things are still happening. How about instead of going on social media to see those things, you go out and do a kind act to substitute for all the evil going on in the world. As children of God, we are called to love on everyone in everything that we do, even if we don't agree with someone else's opinion. I know as a millennial, that we are constantly being looked down on when it comes to social media, being on our phones, and being closed minded. So, why don't we prove the rest of the world wrong? I know I struggle with going on my phone and looking at social media and being angry and upset at someone for their opinions. However, why not instead we agree to disagree? I told one of my friends today that I am so sad for our generation, because they don't get to see how big our world and our God is, because it's constantly being portrayed by social media and the media in general in such a negative light. God called us to be vessels and lights to the non believers and to glorify him in our actions outside the church, because it honors him. So next time you see something that you don't agree with, just move on, go out and change the world, because that's what God expects of us. We can't go out and fix racism, or hatred, or anything else all in one day, but we can go out and be those vessels God has called us to be so we can start to be that change in the world.
In conclusion, I know sometimes looking at these posts can make you upset or angry, but next time you see one just think of what God has done for us. He saved each and everyone of us by dying for our sins, and there is nothing that could be going on in the world that could be bigger than that of Our God!! Go into the world with "blind faith" and know without seeing that not everything going on is as evil as our social media and media is putting out there. One of my favorite verses is Proverbs 3:5-6 and it says this "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean NOT on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight." In the end, none of this chaos compares to God's glory and love for us as long as you submit to him, he will fix it all in the end. So, I challenge you next time you see something negative on twitter; tweet something positive. Next time you see an angry post on Facebook; remind everyone that God's love is greater than our anger or doubt. Media and social media are not the answers to your understandings about creation and the world- God is!
With love,
Hollie Adams
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